On Starting a Project that Scares Me

{Here’s a peek at some more of my new peace collagraph prints—they’ll soon be available in my shop—I’ll let you know when. They have nothing to do with the post below other than an overall theme of finding peace! Enjoy!}


Recently, I’ve started working on a project that wholly intimidates and scares me. I’m not yet able to share exactly what it is—mainly I don’t want to jinx myself by saying too much too soon. Suffice it to say that it’s a project I’ve been meaning to do for a long time, and one that will take many months to complete.

I have a lot of fear about this project—in fact, I’m facing the twin mountains of “I really suck at this” and “this is and will always be a piece of worthless junk.” Or perhaps a better metaphor would be that at times it feels like I’m walking down a narrow hallway with bullies jeering at me about my ineptness and worthlessness and inherent failings.

The amazing thing is this: so far, I’ve been able to brush shoulders with these demons, but continue to walk on, mostly smiling, often still frightened but whispering to myself with sunshine: “I can do this, and I will, because I want to!”

And do you know what? There is no better feeling than this—to walk on by the demons and into the tall sparkling grasses of doing the real work you have dreamed of. There is no better feeling than standing up after working and knowing that you have walked one more hour towards something you had previously only imagined. I still hear the voices of the oppressors, the jeering bullies, but they don’t matter so much compared o the light I feel after taking a few more steps in the right direction.

With this, I wish you the same thing—the courage to take one more small step, for yourself. Do it because you want to. Know that you don’t need any other reason. Know that you don’t need to be brilliant, you just need to show up. And know that the fire in you will always be there to keep you company.

Happy Creating!


4 Responses to “On Starting a Project that Scares Me”

  1. 1 Leah February 22, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    Thank you for this beautiful post! It really encouraged and heartened me. I have been fighting a lot of internal demons lately and your line “to walk on by the demons and into the tall sparkling grasses of doing the real work you have dreamed of” resounded vibrantly with me. I am trying to hew out my path towards ‘the real work that I have been dreaming of.’

    Thanks for your poetry, encouragement, and delightful art.


    • 2 Nicole | Blue Bicicletta February 23, 2011 at 10:24 am

      Thanks so much for this comment Leah! I’m so happy that it resonated with you! I notice so often that doing the work you dream of is about getting out of the way. It can be as simple as continuing to walk forward, not letting the voices of fear get in your way. It is so often easier said than done, but that too becomes about getting out of your own way! I wish you so much luck on your path!

  2. 3 Katie Goode February 22, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    It makes a huge difference to think of those negative thoughts as something outside of ourselves… Love the “demons” image – I was picturing Jack Nicholson saying “Redrum” :) I like to pull out my inner Buffy the Vampire Slayer whenever I’m facing the fear/self-doubt demons.

    Good luck on your project! Can’t wait to hear about it.

    • 4 Nicole | Blue Bicicletta February 23, 2011 at 10:21 am

      Oh, that’s just perfect Katie! Jack Nicholson in The Shining is a perfect image, and I also love the idea of having a mythical figure to fight back with. I also love your point about seeing the negative thoughts as something outside of ourselves. This is so key, and yet it’s so easy to forget!

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Hello there! My name is Nicole K. Docimo, and I am an artist and writer from the U.S.A. but currently residing in Zurich, Switzerand. Thank you for visiting my blog!

Some Thoughts

"Be thirsty for the ultimate water,
and then be ready for what will
come pouring from the spring."

{from "Joy at Sudden Disappointment"
translated by C. Barks.}

~This Work ~

Unless otherwise noted, all images and writings on this blog were created by me, Nicole K. Docimo aka Blue Bicicletta. If you would like to share anything you see here for inspirational purposes online, I just ask that you kindly let folks know where you found it. If you are wanting to share/reproduce any of my work in any other way, or have any questions about how you will be sharing the work in relation to copyright, please contact me directly at nkdocimo {at} gmail {dot} com. Thanks!

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